Sex scenes are like politics: Everyone has an opinion about them. And there’s nothing like a steamy sex scene in a novel for stirring controversy. Some readers object to anything beyond the ubiquitous dot-dot-dot of novels published in earlier eras (the equivalent of the kissing scene in a 1950’s movie that fades to ocean waves crashing on a beach). Some readers feel it’s a cheat when a sex scene isn’t explicit with every pant, gasp, and moan of pleasure described in detail. I’ve heard from both sides on this subject, though I should add, the sex scenes in my novels are tame compared to the likes of Fifty Shades of Grey or even some contemporary romance titles.
My first experience in writing sex scenes came early in my career. I was tasked with creating a romance series for “mature” teen readers in which the teenage characters have sex. This on the heels of the phenomenally successful and squeaky-clean Sweet Valley High series (for which I was a ghost writer). I was given specific instructions by my publisher. The books would contain nothing remotely explicit and the couple had to be in a long-time relationship if they were having sex. In other words, no casual hookups, no mention of body parts, or graphic descriptions of lovemaking. Gotcha. Needless to say, this required delicate handling on my part, not unlike that of making a souffle. The result was my series Seniors, which features scenes involving steamy car windows, heavy breathing and pounding hearts, etc. without actually going there. My favorite scene is the one in Book One of the series, Too Much, Too Soon, in which Kit McCoy loses her virginity. There’s a line that goes something like “Her pulse quickened as his hand traveled up the inseam of her jeans.” I thought it was pretty nifty when I wrote it and still do. No further description is needed for a reader with any imagination to guess what happens next.
As a reader, I prefer less explicit sex scenes. Not because I’m a prude but because I believe the imagination paints what’s between the lines far better than any words can. This reminds me of when I first moved to British Columbia in the late 1960’s. My then husband and I were so broke we couldn’t afford a TV but could access the audio of a single TV channel on our stereo. Luckily, it was a channel that aired old movies. I listened to such oldies-but-goodies as “The Naked Jungle,” starring Charlton Heston, my imagination painting the scenes in vivid Technicolor. When I later watched those movies, I was disappointed to find they weren’t as good visually as I’d imagined. The same goes for fiction—the majority of the movies made from books I’ve read aren’t as good as the book.
My goal in writing sex scenes is to straddle the line between vivid and TMI. Just as too much information can be off-putting, too little can seem timid. That’s just my personal taste. I think it’s a mistake for any author to write according to the presumed expectations of readers. When you write what comes naturally, the result is almost always better than “short-order-cook” writing.
My favorite quote came from an elderly woman who approached me at an in-store book signing years ago. She told me she’d read and loved my then newly published first novel Garden of Lies, especially its “juicy” sex scenes. “If I can’t have it, I want to read about it,” she said.
Enough said.
That book title! “Too Much, Too Soon” says so much in only four words.
Thank you! I liked it when I came up with it and still do.
Absolutely LOVE this post!!! And, I prefer to imagine the sex scenes rather than read explicit details about what is happening. PLEASE keep up your excellent story-telling.
Always. And thank you for your kind words. I promise to keep them coming (no pun intended).